She Has a Story

So this pretty girl has a story. She is going on 29 years old, (if she isn't there already.) We bought her for my son when he was still in high school. She is a great horse, but he found another one he wanted at the time that was more suited for him. So I said, "Go ahead and get her, but that means Juliee is mine." He did pay for the other horse himself, but he was still in high school and he and all the horses were in fact still living here, so I felt justified in taking claim to Juliee. 

Juliee was once a 4H/barrel racing horse with her previous owner. She loved to run when she was younger and has always loved rides. She is probably the best horse we have ever had. She loves to ride, she spooks at virtually nothing, balks at nothing and comes when she sees me. She saddles easily and does everything I ask. She has always been an easy keeper. And I think she loves me.

The truth is, she has been a great horse for me as I age, as I don't quite ride like I did when I was young. "We are just two old grey mares," I always say, "so we don't ride aggressively."

I just felt like talking about her, today. This is probably our last season together. She is missing teeth and colics more easily, as is common with horses as they age. She has gone from the "easy keeper" to the most expensive animal or hobby that we have ever owned. But she has been worth every penny. Not sure hubby would agree.

Anyway, she colicked badly this spring, just after she made it through that harsh winter. The vet came and got her through the colic with all the stuff they do. But both the vet and I felt there was something more going on, when the next day she was still not back to normal. Not at all like the other colics we had experienced. So, back to our home the vet came. We did the minimal testing in light of her age and considering if the expense would be worth only a few more years of life. The blood work we *did* do, all came back normal. Vet was stumped and said Juliee would have to go to clinic for more tests to know for sure what was wrong. The vet thought maybe she had a stroke, or a neck injury that could cause stroke like symptoms.(Too complicated for me.) I couldn't justify the expense.

She wasn't really in any pain it seemed, so we opted to watch her a couple days to see if anything changed. In those days, I made a couple calls to the vet and they went above and beyond the call of duty in the amount of time they spent with me and my probably really stupid questions. One call was probably a 45 minute phone call on a Sunday, no less.

I don't remember the exact time frame, but one vet told me, I think it might be time to put her down. I agreed. We just couldn't justify the expense at her age and I didn't want her to suffer. Somewhere in there, the farrier had come to trim her feet and agreed she may have had a stroke.

On the final call I made to the vet to ask them to come put her down, the vet told me I could give her a round of steroids pretty cheaply as a last ditch effort. I said yes, and went out to the clinic to get them.

Long story, not so short. The week of steroids worked! We thought we may have to continue them through the summer, but at least she would have one last season with us after being such a trooper through the long winter. As it turned out she didn't need any further treatment.

But I was convinced I would never ride her again...she was still doing stroke like things periodically, i.e. some stumbling and some confusion. I was happy just to have her. The vet had told me no more hay, as she was missing teeth and not chewing well which was probably what caused the colic. So now she is strictly on only grain and Alfalfa/Timothy pellets. Now that spring and summer are here, she can also graze the shorter grass in the pasture.

This plan was to be just for the summer. "I will put her down in the fall," I told the vet. I didn't want her going through another tough winter... especially without having something to graze and keep her busy through the long snowy days.

So anyway, we watched her carefully through April and May, with this plan in mind. But she was steadily improving and had no need of more steroids. The farrier came again and was amazed at her agility for an arthritic horse of her age. "Do you think I should ride her?" I asked him, feeling he had more knowledge than me.

"You know her best," he replied. "Just watch her and be sensitive to her."

So I am not gonna lie. I have stewed and wondered; stressed and worried about riding her. I just don't want to hurt her. Or do anything that causes her any harm. But as I've watched her the last couple weeks or so, she honestly looks better and is acting better than she has in probably two years. It is absolutely amazing.

Today I bit the bullet, and decided to take her for a short ride. Yes I was nervous. But when I swung up in that saddle (not at all gracefully, I'm sure ) and I saw she was ready to go with ears forward, I knew I had made the right decision. She wanted to go out the gate instead of staying in pasture. But I didn't want to do that just yet, until I could see how she fared the ride.

Truthfully, I feel like she is a miracle horse... And the words keep coming back to me that I once read somewhere. "God gave you a horse to ride, now ride."

So we did. She seemed to enjoy it. It really isn't about riding for me any more. It's about the feel of the reins, the creek of the saddle and the nostalgia and memories of better rides when I was younger. It's about being in the fresh air and nice weather as my horse and I watch and feel the same things. At my age, it's kinda about knowing we are still able and that she let me and was in it with me...or maybe just *for* me.

We won't ride as much this summer. It'll be on cool mornings, or soft evenings. And it won't be far and it won't be long and it most certainly won't be hard. But the payoff for a horse like this isn't in the rides anyway. It's in the love she gives.